tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-49161943396671220312011-11-07T20:09:31.541ZMotherhood and AnarchyMotherhood and Anarchy...http://www.blogger.com/profile/12535139562870268574noreply@blogger.comBlogger1031100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4916194339667122031.post-80257445285746581272010-01-21T20:23:00.002Z2010-01-21T20:35:15.761Z

Thank you for visiting.Motherhood and Anarchy has moved to www.saffiafarr.com.Thank you to all who have read my posts and commented. The blog is continuing at its new home and I hope you continue to enjoy the discussions. Please update your RSS feed!Thank you for your support.Saffia

Motherhood and Anarchy...http://www.blogger.com/profile/12535139562870268574noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4916194339667122031.post-56594646550481587472010-01-14T19:59:00.002Z2010-01-14T20:15:23.567Z

School was open today and weather forecasters are predicting a big thaw over the weekend. Now I’m starting to panic how I will cope next week without my “snow day”. Despite my objections to the principles, I’ve got used to our days off. It's become a treat to be protected by the muffler of snow from the normal requirements to chase and chivvy and frantically dash to school. The twilight, ethereal

Motherhood and Anarchy...http://www.blogger.com/profile/12535139562870268574noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4916194339667122031.post-44369945622560600152010-01-10T12:04:00.004Z2010-01-10T12:34:46.498Z

Okay, so it's quite hard work getting children in and out of coats, hats, gloves and boots, but I'm quite enjoying living with snow. It's beautiful; cold and crisp, huge crystals glittering in the sunshine. We are finally experiencing the stereotypical images of winter that are usually only seen in Christmas cards and history books.Maybe it's because I got used to this way of life when we lived

Motherhood and Anarchy...http://www.blogger.com/profile/12535139562870268574noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4916194339667122031.post-41744054949956756912010-01-07T22:34:00.004Z2010-01-07T22:46:10.309Z

Tonight I have been to book club - what joy it was to get out of the house and talk to adults! Inevitably, we discussed school closures. Someone made a point I wanted to share - that the fact schools close so easily is actually a sad indictment of society. It's because we've all become too litigious, too quick to cast blame and sue for any upset, that schools have become so anxious to limit

Motherhood and Anarchy...http://www.blogger.com/profile/12535139562870268574noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4916194339667122031.post-86493520117982773342010-01-06T21:48:00.005Z2010-01-06T22:08:24.746Z

During the snow in February 2009 I had a rant about how easily schools closed and how this sets a bad example to our children. “...What it says to them is that when things get tough we just give up...” I fear I must vent again!This morning my 6 year old was crying because, at 7am, there had not been an announcement that his school was closed. There was snow so he assumed that school would close.

Motherhood and Anarchy...http://www.blogger.com/profile/12535139562870268574noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4916194339667122031.post-87121118291771776802009-12-23T19:29:00.003Z2009-12-23T19:36:40.749Z

This morning I heard a woman being interviewed on the radio, claiming that she was not sure how she’d cope if her delayed Ocado delivery did not arrive. Oh please, I thought, is this what we've come to. Could she not lift herself from her despair and go to a shop? And is it really THAT important, will it change her life? Have we gone mad as a society, have we completely lost perspective?I felt

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I still puzzle over this blogging phenomenon; why we feel the need to publish our thoughts and share opinions with strangers. However, blogging has brought me some unique experiences, things I would have never tried if I wasn’t in the virtual world meeting new people. For example, last week I reviewed a book on-line with someone I “met” through blogging. And it was great fun. My virtual book

Motherhood and Anarchy...http://www.blogger.com/profile/12535139562870268574noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4916194339667122031.post-73818980928641581292009-12-13T20:08:00.004Z2009-12-13T20:17:02.166Z

At Sunday School we are having very interesting discussions which are challenging and inspiring both adults and children. We are thinking about the nativity story behind the Christmas card scene; what it was like for Mary who was probably a young teenager, giving birth for the first time away from home and family; how it would really feel to sleep in a stable; why shepherds were chosen as the

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I love the one-off comments children come out with – funny but at the same time often sad and poignant, an insight into their perceptions, fears or passions. I have a book called Lots of Love, a collection of such phrases edited by Nanette Newman. “My mother ses she’s cold and then she makes me put on a coat”...”you couldn’t make everyone in the world love each other. They dont even get on in

Motherhood and Anarchy...http://www.blogger.com/profile/12535139562870268574noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4916194339667122031.post-18993024053167455562009-12-04T11:25:00.003Z2010-01-29T22:03:27.829Z

My six year old has his first loose tooth. He is delighted. Losing teeth is the most popular subject in his class at school (after football cards). He said one boy spent the “whole morning” in the toilet waggling his teeth! T is completely envious of peers who have already lost a tooth but I have discovered how much I am dreading this stage.I had forgotten those years of losing teeth, of waggling

Motherhood and Anarchy...http://www.blogger.com/profile/12535139562870268574noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4916194339667122031.post-30117779035568760672009-11-23T20:25:00.004Z2009-11-23T20:50:43.824Z

The Book Thief by Markus Zusak was my selection for Book Club. After I’d read it I felt a bit guilty for inflicting such a harrowing tale on a group of mums. I cried when I finished it. I was on a train. The man next to me was very tactful about not noticing the woman next to him dabbing her eyes. But I must have been slightly naive not to have realised that a story of a girl and a Jew in Nazi

Motherhood and Anarchy...http://www.blogger.com/profile/12535139562870268574noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4916194339667122031.post-12489333311857504082009-11-15T22:10:00.002Z2009-11-15T22:17:23.754Z

For three days last week my son B (3) was ill. Nothing serious, he was bright in himself, but enough to keep him from his mornings at nursery. Apart from the school runs that top and tail the day, I didn’t leave the house. I didn’t go outside the village boundary. That might sound limiting, but it was great.One of the benefits of being a stay at home mum is that when a child is ill it doesn’t

Motherhood and Anarchy...http://www.blogger.com/profile/12535139562870268574noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4916194339667122031.post-363005063352100022009-11-04T20:01:00.004Z2009-11-04T20:17:39.686Z

It's typical of my over-active mind that a five minute ponder about where we could possibly fit in any new toys the children might be given at Christmas has turned into an analytical self-questioning blog! The day after I’d stood in the boys’ room wondering how I could shuffle things around to make more space, I read Whistlejacket’s post Not Mad About the Toys and subsequently posted a reply

Motherhood and Anarchy...http://www.blogger.com/profile/12535139562870268574noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4916194339667122031.post-17639573039723853792009-10-28T21:13:00.003Z2009-10-28T21:38:51.770Z

Last week I travelled to London to attend the inaugural meeting of the Kyrgyz-British society. It was great. Stepping out of the train and across London I felt an exhilarating sense of freedom. London is different. It smells different. It has a vibe. There’s a constant hum of traffic. There are so many people talking so many languages. Looking back my rural village seemed drab and ordinary in

Motherhood and Anarchy...http://www.blogger.com/profile/12535139562870268574noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4916194339667122031.post-51067725362906643982009-10-24T20:37:00.006+01:002009-12-13T21:20:00.321Z

This is a follow up post to one written by Whistlejacket about having too many toys. All the comments to her post were in agreement – yes we have too many toys; yes people are too generous at Christmas but what can we do, relatives like giving children presents; yes there’s no need to buy toys for children to tell them you love them; yes younger children are happy playing with older siblings'

Motherhood and Anarchy...http://www.blogger.com/profile/12535139562870268574noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4916194339667122031.post-17255398798370619682009-10-23T11:03:00.004+01:002009-10-23T11:11:29.112+01:00

In his book Superpowers for Parents (click here for my review), Dr Stephen Briers writes “The pace of our modern world conditions our children to expect everything instantly...most children play computer games that deliver a rapid succession of satisfying “hits” in return for very little sustained effort. One drawback of this is that today’s children often have very little experience of the

Motherhood and Anarchy...http://www.blogger.com/profile/12535139562870268574noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4916194339667122031.post-46325135191996351482009-10-22T22:16:00.004+01:002009-10-22T22:29:03.741+01:00

For women who like to write I can recommend a listen to today's edition of BBC Radio 4's Woman's Hour on BBC iPlayer (available for a week).http://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/b00n7gj8/Womans_Hour_22_10_2009/It was focused around Virginia Woolf's A Room of One's Own, discussing what it was like to be a woman writer then, and now. It ended with reflections on "a room of one's own". That is my

Motherhood and Anarchy...http://www.blogger.com/profile/12535139562870268574noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4916194339667122031.post-37103997249619994612009-10-21T19:02:00.002+01:002009-10-21T19:06:16.037+01:00

I'm not really into You Tube but I saw this on someone else's blog and it did make me smile.http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hooid1LJ9Kc&feature=player_embeddedThere's something special about the fat chuckles of babies. But I couldn't help wondering what it was like when all four cried at once!

Motherhood and Anarchy...http://www.blogger.com/profile/12535139562870268574noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4916194339667122031.post-90180429422810051072009-10-21T11:54:00.003+01:002009-10-21T12:11:37.860+01:00

Following on from the last posts about books, books, books it seems apt to comment that amazon.co.uk is dangerous; one book leads to another. They are very good at linking books so that while looking at one title, another pops up and you think “that looks interesting” and click. Before you know it there are ten books in your basket. And I’m the sucker who buys them all. A virtual “chain of books

Motherhood and Anarchy...http://www.blogger.com/profile/12535139562870268574noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4916194339667122031.post-20764261230080326742009-10-16T10:14:00.004+01:002009-10-16T10:35:41.637+01:00

Thank you for the great response to my question What are you Reading. I've been really enjoying all the book conversations.Following on from my comment to Katherine about the Paul Auster book and a conversation I had with a friend last night, I have a new question: Are there any books on your shelf that have been there for years? You know you will read them one day but it just never seems to be

Motherhood and Anarchy...http://www.blogger.com/profile/12535139562870268574noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4916194339667122031.post-20019775412607558562009-10-12T11:42:00.004+01:002009-10-16T10:37:54.106+01:00

I’ve borrowed this idea from my friend Alastair, who in turn borrowed it from another blogger. I love books and always find it fascinating to hear what other people are reading. Therefore, the idea of this post is to get as many people as possible to share:1. What they have just read2. What they are reading now3. What they are planning to read next.What to read next is always one of my favourite

Motherhood and Anarchy...http://www.blogger.com/profile/12535139562870268574noreply@blogger.com20tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4916194339667122031.post-21939817649107433862009-10-09T12:25:00.002+01:002009-10-09T12:29:07.949+01:00

This morning I’ve been making a birthday cake. It’s a perilous occupation. I have on my shoulders the weight of expectation of a 5 turning 6 year old and it’s heavy. A few weeks ago I heard him tell someone “my daddy knows how to make a cake shaped like a six”. Sh**, I thought. His daddy is working away in Bangladesh so it falls to me to achieve the perfection that everything must be when you

Motherhood and Anarchy...http://www.blogger.com/profile/12535139562870268574noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4916194339667122031.post-1843484688895442052009-10-06T22:36:00.002+01:002009-10-06T22:47:15.830+01:00

Having three children can be chaotic but, interestingly, I feel a third child has brought balance and almost calm to our family because of the relationships it has created. One of my favourite things about mothering is the dynamic between the children.Although boys T (5 – but 6 this month!) and B (3) fight constantly, they are incredibly close. Sometimes I wonder if they are too close. They share

Motherhood and Anarchy...http://www.blogger.com/profile/12535139562870268574noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4916194339667122031.post-60454853220811231482009-10-03T21:48:00.003+01:002009-10-03T22:16:30.767+01:00

This is a really interesting post from my friend Alastair Humphreys – adventurer, author, motivational speaker. I met Al when he cycled through Bishkek and stayed with us in our Soviet flat. The story of his four year cycle around the world is fascinating, as are Al’s blog posts. Like me he thinks and reflects on things, but whereas my thoughts are bogged down with children, his are more

Motherhood and Anarchy...http://www.blogger.com/profile/12535139562870268574noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4916194339667122031.post-57217094191290665362009-09-30T22:21:00.002+01:002009-09-30T22:37:14.467+01:00

This morning I went to Town. I don’t like going to Town. I’ve adapted to living next to cows and green fields so that in Town I feel claustrophobic. It felt crowded; there were students everywhere, making me feel old in their frighteningly fashionable clothes. There were roadworks and ambulances and runners and cyclists and lots and lots of mums. Mums pushing prams with baby toes peeping out.

Motherhood and Anarchy...http://www.blogger.com/profile/12535139562870268574noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4916194339667122031.post-55563663216135430792009-09-28T21:07:00.003+01:002009-09-28T21:30:40.108+01:00

Kayla Williams enlisted in the US army at the age of twenty-three and learnt Arabic in order to be Military Intelligence. She was posted to Iraq, staying for a year. This book was sold as telling how it was to be “Young and Female in the US Army.” On some pages I was really disappointed, on others I was fascinated. The beginning is frustrating, lots of anecdotes about the injustices of sexual

Motherhood and Anarchy...http://www.blogger.com/profile/12535139562870268574noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4916194339667122031.post-17978397835195853642009-09-21T20:26:00.004+01:002009-09-21T21:04:53.249+01:00

There is no doubt that parents are role models for their children. One of the saddest thing I've heard recently involves pupils in a school in a deprived area of Kent. A friend of mine teaches there and he told me that if you ask children in his class what they want to be when they grow up, they tell you they want to be on benefits. They can aspire to nothing else if every adult they see makes

Motherhood and Anarchy...http://www.blogger.com/profile/12535139562870268574noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4916194339667122031.post-56503615967534971232009-09-20T20:28:00.003+01:002009-09-20T20:34:23.176+01:00

Isn’t it depressing when, trying to clean the house, your children manage to mess up where you’ve been by the time you get to the other end of the room.In the same way I feel for the workmen resurfacing a road in our village. As it goes down the tarmac is black and glossy, the surface pristine. By the time they’ve altered the contra-flow and let us all back on, it’s marred by dust and encrusted

Motherhood and Anarchy...http://www.blogger.com/profile/12535139562870268574noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4916194339667122031.post-18866451259291649352009-09-19T21:34:00.004+01:002009-09-19T22:26:44.665+01:00

If you are thinking of reading Notes from an Exhibition and don’t want your reading of it tarnished, best to skip this post.Every reader comes to a book with their own mental history and therefore will read it in a completely different way, perceiving it in absolute opposites. This happened at our first Book Club with Notes from an Exhibition by Patrick Gale.Notes from an Exhibition is simply

Motherhood and Anarchy...http://www.blogger.com/profile/12535139562870268574noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4916194339667122031.post-65644382366119055092009-09-14T19:56:00.003+01:002009-09-14T20:06:54.000+01:00

In June a friend from the village organised a charity book swap. We were all supposed to take books we’d read and loved and buy those offered by others to raise money. This was difficult for me as I rarely part with a book and especially not one I’ve read and loved. Fortunately I found something I had two copies of and, of course, lots I was keen to buy.Surrounded by books, mostly by Sophie

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Following on from my frustrations about my eldest son not playing independently, I tried a little experiment. The idea was to encourage him to push the physical rather than verbal boundaries. I sent him, B and a friend off into the field next to our house; the challenge, to pick blackberries. I was not completely irresponsible. I took a magazine and sat outside where I could see them, Baby J

Motherhood and Anarchy...http://www.blogger.com/profile/12535139562870268574noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4916194339667122031.post-58865254468351027482009-08-26T20:29:00.004+01:002009-08-26T23:57:33.761+01:00

A recurring theme in my thoughts is why my eldest child is not good at playing by himself – it’s something I’ve written about before in The Shame of a Modern Parent.“My Bob used to be out in the garden all day at his age, I had to call him in for his dinner” someone said to me recently, and I wondered why my children do not do this.I came up with two theories, both involving it being my

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In my review of “mummy lit” I have yet to read The Secret Life of a Slummy Mummy by Fiona Neill – but it is on my shelf. However, I have been doing some Internet research and came across some interesting comments on the book by Katie Roiphe on Slate. She writes “What is being celebrated here is the mindlessness of a certain type of child-rearing, a mindlessness we as a culture are currently

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My five year old is into words – he never stops talking and has an answer for everything. I should be proud, he gets it from me. I’ve realised that he’s me with a willy, which means at times our relationship is probably more tempestuous than it should be. So, he loves words, nonsense words and rhyming words. This has the potential for trouble as he walks around chanting “lucker-chucker-fucker”

Motherhood and Anarchy...http://www.blogger.com/profile/12535139562870268574noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4916194339667122031.post-7595765384396399232009-08-06T19:38:00.008+01:002009-08-06T19:53:13.263+01:00

Last night I was reading a section in Steve Biddulph’s “Raising Boys” titled “Why boys scuffle and fight”. The answer is testosterone. “There’s no doubt it causes energetic and boisterous behaviour...Boys feel insecure and in danger if there isn’t enough structure in a situation...they begin jostling with each other to establish the pecking order.” This is interesting, but difficult to know how

Motherhood and Anarchy...http://www.blogger.com/profile/12535139562870268574noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4916194339667122031.post-69843790531643511202009-08-05T19:45:00.003+01:002009-08-05T19:54:02.313+01:00

In my current trawl through Mummy Lit (researching the market for the book I hope to write) I have just come across a section charmingly titled “Who The Fuck Am I?”I sometimes wonder in this modern age if we spend too much time thinking about ourselves – what I want, me time, who am I? Is it good to be aware of yourself, does it make you a happier person, or has it been overdone with the result

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Do we moan too much? Darla Shine, author of Happy Housewives, says yes. The basic premise of her book is that housewives spend too much time moaning about how hard their lives are when really we should count our blessings and get on with it. “When did it become fashionable to be an out-of-control mother on the edge?” Darla chats at you from her kitchen island about how great it is to be a

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I love the logic of children, it can throw such interesting perspective on what we say and how we behave.Today was a good example. After listening to a radio news item about the Met Office changing their summer forecast from "barbecue" to "rain" my five year old said "yeah, I'll get more television and time for artwork rather than you saying it's a lovely sunny day go and play outside."There's

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In 1935 a young mother wrote a letter to Nursery World asking “Can any mother help me? I live a very lonely life...can any reader suggest an occupation that will intrigue me and exclude “thinking” and cost nothing!” Through this letter the Cooperative Correspondence Club, CCC, was formed by a group of women who wrote to each other through a private magazine that was circulated between them. Jenna

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Suzanne Kamata is the editor of Call Me Okaasan: Adventures in Multicultural Mothering. This is a thought-provoking anthology written by mothers from across the world (including me!) which I reviewed on this blog in May.Suzanne is a fascinating person. She lives in rural Japan with her Japanese husband and bicultural twins and writes to “keep herself sane”. On her blog, Gaijin Mama, you can read

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Like all households we get a lot of mail shots pushed through the door; advertisements for carpet cleaning, conservatories and pleas for money from various charities. I am guilty of gathering it all up and shoving it in the recycling bin. I have no compunction about the conservatories but I’m sure that some of the charities deserve more attention.This morning one caught my eye. As always it was

Motherhood and Anarchy...http://www.blogger.com/profile/12535139562870268574noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4916194339667122031.post-91057082363099785722009-07-03T13:02:00.003+01:002009-07-03T13:32:11.351+01:00

I’ve just finished reading Mother’s Day by Kirsty Scott. I came to it with scepticism for I am a book snob and derogatory about anything with large, pastel italicised writing on the cover. I only chose it for research – I’m trying to read other “mummy-lit” to learn about the competition for the book I’m planning to write – and had dismissed it as trash before I’d even started.I was pleasantly

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The purpose of this blog entry is to link to a piece I wrote for Gaijin Mama, Suzanne Kamata’s blog (Suzanne is editor of Call Me Okaasan). It’s a “day in the life”, a series Suzanne did featuring contributors to the anthology. I meant to post the link when it came out in May but I was busy and distracted and time passed.I post it today because it mentions my gardening efforts with the children

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Today was my son’s first school Sports Day, for me a morning of stomach-churning emotion. I hated Sports Day when I was at school. I was one of the chubby girls; embroiled every year in an unspoken battle with my friend Sarah to see which of us would come last. I can still remember the fear of standing at the start, loathing the tension of waiting for the starting gun. I dreaded the indignity of

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We have been lent some garden toys by a friend who’s having an extension done and can’t currently use them in their garden. They arrived at the weekend, a slide and a plastic caterpillar tunnel. B, the three year old, immediately climbed on top of the tunnel and said “it’s a pirate ship” and the boys launched into huge game of being pirates at sea. It was great to see their creativity.Watching

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This week, doing research for an interview, I found myself drawn into a network of “mommy bloggers”. I enjoyed reading their blogs. As one wrote “there is something powerful in the shared experience of motherhood, regardless of the situation or circumstances.” I find it very therapeutic to discover mothers who think about the same questions and express sentiments I am feeling, something I hope

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This is one of my favourite times of year: the smells and associations of summer; enjoying the first hot days or the anticipation of those to come (not that they’ve materialised over the last two years); the rumble of a hay-making tractor; looking forward to Wimbledon. I love seeing the bright green of a grass tennis court on the television screen and hearing the comforting crack of balls being

Motherhood and Anarchy...http://www.blogger.com/profile/12535139562870268574noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4916194339667122031.post-4216885268249667542009-06-10T19:41:00.003+01:002009-06-10T19:42:56.396+01:00

T came out of school and collapsed theatrically at my feet because he was sooooo tired. Said the best part of the day was having lunch. Wasn't sick on the coach. Success!

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My five year old is out on his first school trip. He is very excited. Last week he came home with a note and specific instructions: he had to have a lunchbox with a handle and no unhealthy food in it. Since then I have been duly making preparations as directed.They are going to a farm. I think T is more excited about the logistics – the packed lunch and going on the coach. He’s been asking me to

Motherhood and Anarchy...http://www.blogger.com/profile/12535139562870268574noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4916194339667122031.post-45199461603790106032009-06-05T20:02:00.008+01:002009-08-05T19:52:04.889+01:00

I cannot believe there have been ten years of Big Brother. I’m not a fan but it’s become an unwanted milestone of the year, so much so that a period of my life can be measured against it.When the Big Brother phenomenon first dominated I was still working as a lawyer in London. I did not join the craze and watch it but it still impacted on my life – friends would agree to meet for the evening, but

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Sweating on the cross trainer in the gym I noticed a headline about Kyrgyzstan scrolling across the bottom of the Sky News screen. Sadly it was not a positive one; an England football fan had been shot in the leg. Great, I thought, now news channels will be negative about Kyrgyzstan.Having lived there for three years I know Kyrgyzstan to be a refreshingly remote country of vast and beautiful

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I was very excited to learn that Call Me Okaasan: Adventures in Multicultural Mothering, in which I have a chapter, has won recognition at the Next Generation Indie Book Awards. It has been named winner in the Parenting and Anthology categories and is third place Grand Prize winner in the nonfiction category. This is an exciting achievement for all the authors and the editor, Suzanne Kamata.http:

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It’s very unlike me but I have been watching Britain’s Got Talent. As a mother I felt slightly strange watching Hollie Steel tonight. She was clearly struggling and then broke down, pleaded to be allowed to start again and lost it when she was told that was not possible – just like a ten year old would. She reminded me of my five year old when his artwork doesn’t go the way he wants it – but

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When Revolution Baby was published I worked hard at marketing, thinking, naively, I could get it all done before Baby 3 was born. I hadn’t appreciated the effect of momentum and how one feature would lead to another. This is how I’ve been introduced to some fantastic projects, and ended up writing much more often than I’d expected with a new baby.I was very flattered to be asked to contribute to

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I was supposed to go to the gym this evening but instead felt I had to stay in and write this blog. I’m sure you’re thinking “yeah right, good excuse for being lazy”. But there is a reason deeper than lethargy.This afternoon I had tea with Bishop Alphonse and his wife Evelyne from Nebbi Diocese in northern Uganda. I have a link with Nebbi Diocese because I lived there for four months after law

Motherhood and Anarchy...http://www.blogger.com/profile/12535139562870268574noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4916194339667122031.post-1118590402632715632009-03-25T20:26:00.005Z2009-05-30T10:06:14.650+01:00

Following on from my last post, I found this article interesting.http://technology.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/tech_and_web/article5600675.ece

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Blogging is a strange thing. My husband encouraged me to start this blog to market Revolution Baby but as I write I still wonder who really cares what I think about Toys R Us or schools closing in snow. As far as I’m aware I only have two readers – Al Humphreys and my mother in law!I was therefore excited to receive an email from Hotels Combined - someone else had read my blog! And they had a

Motherhood and Anarchy...http://www.blogger.com/profile/12535139562870268574noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4916194339667122031.post-52153854048543505462009-03-09T19:20:00.005Z2009-06-19T09:34:51.131+01:00

So far Friends for Tea hasn’t been much success. One child was crying before we even got home, freaked out by our chaotic school run with Baby J arching her back and screaming in protest at being shoved from car seat to buggy and back again. Once home, however, they did all have a wonderful time playing.The second time a friend came back my son had had a serious fall in the playground and after

Motherhood and Anarchy...http://www.blogger.com/profile/12535139562870268574noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4916194339667122031.post-27599002038322995062009-02-06T22:26:00.004Z2009-05-30T09:55:33.213+01:00

I forgot, in my rant about schools closing, that I wanted to counter the negativity by saying thank you to Dave the milkman. At 8 this morning, when everyone seemed to be giving up for the day, he arrived on the doorstep with our milk. This was extra impressive because we live down a very narrow country lane which is never salted. We were about to run out of milk so his perseverance and

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Okay, so we’ve had the worst snow in years but I still think they close the schools too easily these days. My eldest son goes to the village school where most people walk, or could walk to school, and yet it has been closed for two days. By mid-morning roads were easily passable and I know lots of people were travelling about to see friends and family – if travel logistics were the reason for

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When your first child starts school it’s as much of a change for you as it is for them. Days are dictated by a fixed schedule and you have new challenges to face. One of these is Friends for Tea.My son has just started asking to have friends over for tea after school. I’ve discovered that there is quite a network of children going to each other’s houses, something we’ve not been part of. This has

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Back to school, back to blog. The holidays flashed by without a moment to write. I was too busy playing Guess Who with my children. It was great fun; the old games are the best - as are the old books. A good example is The Faraway Tree series by Enid Blyton, one of my childhood favourites. I remember spending hours reading and loving those books so, before Christmas, I went on line to Amazon to

Motherhood and Anarchy...http://www.blogger.com/profile/12535139562870268574noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4916194339667122031.post-90384891179714320902008-12-02T10:30:00.002Z2009-05-30T09:57:00.242+01:00

Toys R Us, I’ve decided, is an odious place. You go in there with a list and rational intentions but once inside get sucked into a panic that your child needs one of everything in the shop for a fulfilled life. I think it’s the noise that disturbs your mind. In every aisle a different jingle is playing. It’s hard to make a sensible decision about playmobil when “Baby Born Baby Born” is ringing in

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Today I met some family for lunch at The Pheasant Inn, Shefford Woodlands, near Hungerford, RG17. Well, I tried to.I had booked ahead and explained we were four adults, two children and a baby but when we arrived we were shown two small tables which they then begrudgingly pushed together. As I tried to get the children into their seats the waitress stood over us saying "drinks, drinks, what do

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I remember once reading an article about cheat ways to diet. One suggestion was to turn the central heating down a few degress so that the body would have to work harder to keep warm and so burn more calories.I can confirm it works. Due to a "catastrophic" leak in our plumbing I've had no central heating for ten days. Yes, it's cold but the bonus is I seem to have lost three kilos without trying

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There are days when you feel life is tough. I think I've been having a tough time lately. My husband is working away for three weeks so I'm at home alone with the three children. The boys seem to be permanently antagonistic and aggressive, there's always one shouting, crying, pushing, thumping, hurt. Neither the carrot or stick methods of dealing with them are working and I don't quite know what

Motherhood and Anarchy...http://www.blogger.com/profile/12535139562870268574noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4916194339667122031.post-5545297725563993782008-11-13T20:44:00.005Z2009-05-30T10:02:10.436+01:00

I've not collapsed in a pile of empty bottles. I've just had a soak in the bath and am now eating comfort food (muesli) in front of the fire watching TV (unheard of for me) while my husband does the ironing (unusual for him)! I feel like a new woman.

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Is this the beginning of the end?I'm having a bit of a crap time at the moment - I won't write why as it will probably sound bleatingly pathetic in print. However, feeling a bit fed up this lunchtime I opened the fridge to get something innocuous like cheese and spied an open bottle of wine. I must confess, I've had a glass! Drinking at lunchtime, help! But I do feel much better.Don't worry, I've

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Today I had my first "only eight weeks to go until Christmas!" email, written in breathless tension to imply that if I didn't shop with them right then I would be wildly behind schedule. For goodness sake, it's still October!However, I have spent the week organising Christmas presents - but for good reason. At my son's school they have been invited to fill a shoe box with gifts to send to a child

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I saw a friend walking through the village this morning. She looked so different - because she wasn't pushing a buggy and didn't have any children hanging off her. She was striding, walking fast and confidently. I could tell that she was enjoying her moment of solitude and independence in the beautiful autumn sunshine. I could sense her savouring the freedom of only carrying one small bag, of not

Motherhood and Anarchy...http://www.blogger.com/profile/12535139562870268574noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4916194339667122031.post-38567872484946501472008-10-17T20:06:00.005+01:002009-07-01T21:43:58.883+01:00

Recently, with the world as we know it apparently crashing around our ears, I said to my husband "I think everyone just needs to calm down and concentrate on the basics". "There's the voice of the housewife," he replied.I don't really understand any of the complex economics but I do think that we have lived too fast; we've wanted everything quickly, cheap and now and it's not sustainable,

Motherhood and Anarchy...http://www.blogger.com/profile/12535139562870268574noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4916194339667122031.post-32064407517090477802008-10-10T11:41:00.005+01:002009-05-30T09:58:51.187+01:00

Our media is swamped with doomsday reports of how we are plunging into a world of tightening our belts. I was at the supermarket this morning and decided this might not be a bad thing. You only have to look around and see how fat we are as a nation to realise we have had too much excess. We know nothing of self-restraint, only Buy One Get One Free so we can eat twice as much.Also at the

Motherhood and Anarchy...http://www.blogger.com/profile/12535139562870268574noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4916194339667122031.post-63788884080922271122008-10-07T20:04:00.003+01:002009-05-30T10:02:40.241+01:00

Yesterday my son came home from school with a shaker he'd made, a paper plate folded in half and filled with pasta. Glued to it was a typed note: Please be aware that this shaker contains small parts. Thank you.Is this the level of paranoia we've reached in our society? Have we become so quick to blame someone and litigate over the slightest incident that a primary school feels it necessary to

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Until today I never believed I could multi task. My husband agreed because, unlike him, I am unable to read a magazine, work on a lap top and follow a whodunnit on TV. However, this afternoon I managed to make macaroni cheese while rocking a baby and singing Five Little Ducks Went Swimming One Day. I think I only succeeded because the baby-rocking motion corresponded with the rhythm of stirring

Motherhood and Anarchy...http://www.blogger.com/profile/12535139562870268574noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4916194339667122031.post-7265592378789963382008-09-24T15:16:00.003+01:002009-05-30T09:39:18.042+01:00

If you are thinking of visiting Kyrgyzstan I can recommend the Odyssey guide to the Kyrgyz Republic.http://www.amazon.co.uk/Kyrgyz-Republic-Heart-Central-Odyssey/dp/9622177913/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1222266223&sr=8-1The third edition has recently been put together by dedicated authors Rowan Stewart and Susie Weldon and was launched last week at Daunt Books in London.I am especially

Motherhood and Anarchy...http://www.blogger.com/profile/12535139562870268574noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4916194339667122031.post-35897710370320494672008-09-19T10:10:00.003+01:002009-05-30T09:38:22.187+01:00

For anyone who is interested in experiencing a flavour of Kyrgyz life I can recommend Jamilia by Chingiz Aitmatov. It is a short but poignant love story, wonderfully evocative of Kyrgyz rural life. His descriptions transported me back to the huge expanses of valley, sky and mountain in Central Asia, the true remoteness and stillness of countryside untouched by our fast, modern world.Chingiz

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My eldest son has just started school. It is a new era, life changing for all of us. He has been fantastic, so brave. After a few nerves on his first visit he now walks ahead of me up to school, swinging his book bag singing “big school big school” to himself. He’s proud to look smart in his uniform, proud to tell me about the new rules and routines – “ you have to say ‘please may I go to the

Motherhood and Anarchy...http://www.blogger.com/profile/12535139562870268574noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4916194339667122031.post-85810103387654694782008-09-12T21:46:00.003+01:002009-05-30T10:24:18.250+01:00

In many things my boys are the same - especially because No. 2 copies and mimics No. 1. In their fears they are very different, as I discovered today. No 2. son was sitting on the carpet doing puzzles when a huge spider lumbered towards him. He whimpered and shied away. I whacked it with a magazine. Sorry. No. 1 son would have picked it up and carried it out of the door. But No. 1 son is scared

Motherhood and Anarchy...http://www.blogger.com/profile/12535139562870268574noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4916194339667122031.post-9204393142486885902008-08-19T22:00:00.005+01:002009-08-19T11:42:05.495+01:00

On Sunday my two year old was playing beautifully with “Bristol Builder”, a construction toy with wooden blocks, sticks and circles. He turned to me with an “L” shape he’d made and said, “look mummy, a shooter.”What to do in this situation is a question many parents ask. Of course, guns are not nice things, they kill people, so the natural reaction is to say “no dear, it’s not a shooter but a

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We have just returned from two wet weeks in Cornwall. However, the hardest thing was not the weather but the sad realisation that my four year old declared he was bored on the beach. "What do I do now?" he whined, "I want you to play with me". Despite having a fantastic imagination, and moments of wonderful independent play, what he really wanted was our attention. If we dutifully started

Motherhood and Anarchy...http://www.blogger.com/profile/12535139562870268574noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4916194339667122031.post-1187440979610267202008-05-19T09:57:00.005+01:002009-05-30T10:31:04.285+01:00

I've not written for a while because four weeks ago Baby 3 was born. Since then I've been ignoring the call of technology, emails and blogs which sap your time, and enjoying her newness.I've made a surprising discovery - that three children are easier than two - at the moment anyway. When Baby 2 was born, T was a terrible two and rampaged while I was pinned to the chair feeding. Now, with Baby 3,

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One reason I hope this baby isn't too late is that I'm speaking at a Kyrgyz evening on Wednesday 14th May.The event is at Stanfords travel bookshop in Bristol where I will be joining Rowan Stewart and Susie Weldon, authors of the Odyssey guide to the Kyrgyz Republic in talking about Kyrgyzstan. We will be showing photos, selling crafts, displaying our yurt and welcoming you with vodka.For more

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The twinges came to nothing and I'm still waiting. It's an odd time, lying in bed at night and waking every morning thinking "will it be today?" You live in a state of uncertainty, knowing that something extraordinary is about to happen and your life is about to change drastically again but not quite knowing when, or how it will start. I keep making appointments wondering if I'll keep them.My

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Sorry I haven't written for so long. I've been busy trying to get all the jobs done which I think must be done before baby arrives. I'm sure none of them are actually necessary, but I'm hormonal and can't be expected to think rationally.Probably the most important thing to do is pack my hospital bag, which is why I haven't done that yet. I'm possibly about to get my comeuppance for my

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I'm feeling sorry for myself today. My parents are having a large drinks party and my husband has been asked to help. That leaves me looking after the children alone on a Sunday, again, trapped by their inescapable demands and squabbles to the extent I feel claustrophobic.We tried joining the party but a room full of adults holding glasses of wine is not really an appropriate place for two

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I've just returned from a holiday in The Gambia, West Africa, with my two children (aged 4 and 2). "Are you mad?" I hear you gasp, "travelling with children!"Actually, it's very rewarding.I never expected that I would ever take a child abroad - I didn't fly until I was twelve and there's nothing wrong with Cornwall. But since I gave up my career to travel with my husband I've learnt that nothing

Motherhood and Anarchy...http://www.blogger.com/profile/12535139562870268574noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4916194339667122031.post-36866084300490280662008-02-07T13:08:00.001Z2009-05-30T10:04:16.763+01:00

After years of hard word and fretting over writing Revolution Baby: Motherhood and Anarchy in Kyrgyzstan it's always very rewarding when people contact me to say how much they've enjoyed reading it. Carole very kindly sent an extremely detailed review and it was especially gratifying to see that she had enjoyed and interpreted the book in a way I hoped people would.Review of Revolution Baby:

Motherhood and Anarchy...http://www.blogger.com/profile/12535139562870268574noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4916194339667122031.post-16937540271705729502008-02-05T18:58:00.002Z2009-05-30T09:58:29.314+01:00

Those who have read my book and become interested in yurts might like to look at http://www.yurtworks.co.uk/This company is run by Tim Hutton who makes beautiful yurts and also runs a yurt camp as an alternative holiday venue in Cornwall.Tim showed one of his yurt frames at my book launch last November, a beautiful structure which looked stunning in the gallery at the RWA. You can see a photo of

Motherhood and Anarchy...http://www.blogger.com/profile/12535139562870268574noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4916194339667122031.post-23175739382613860062008-01-20T19:52:00.003Z2009-12-13T20:21:10.950Z

Two children, two kittens and three ducks - these are my dependents; solely my dependents at the moment as my husband has been working abroad for two weeks. I can feel very sorry for myself; in all this foul weather I've been on my own with two hyperactive boys, wind and rain lashing incessantly against the windows, flood waters rising on the lane outside. And I'm six months pregnant. But I feel

Motherhood and Anarchy...http://www.blogger.com/profile/12535139562870268574noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4916194339667122031.post-69660339097426902882008-01-15T19:54:00.001Z2009-05-30T10:04:51.029+01:00

Great excitement - I am published in The Telegraph. An article which I have written about the Tulip Revolution in Kyrgyzstan has been published in The Weekly Telegraph and is on-line at http://www.telegraph.co.uk/global/main.jhtml?xml=/global/2008/01/15/kyrgyzstan.xml&page=1

Motherhood and Anarchy...http://www.blogger.com/profile/12535139562870268574noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4916194339667122031.post-42515892431539099242008-01-13T20:02:00.002Z2009-05-30T10:59:07.336+01:00

For those of you with young children who enjoy reading stories with an adult undercurrent, I recommend Zagazoo by Quentin Blake. A couple receive a baby in the post and are enjoying its fun until it turns into a squawking vulture. It becomes a rampaging elephant, filthy warthog and angry dragon until it turns into a large, hairy monster which keeps growing. The parents are exhausted and

Motherhood and Anarchy...http://www.blogger.com/profile/12535139562870268574noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4916194339667122031.post-91943768931860095512007-12-23T13:38:00.002Z2009-12-13T20:19:21.912Z

I am delighted to read that Father Christmas has been told to relocate to Kyrgyzstan.http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/main.jhtml;jsessionid=DZ35HFBALUSONQFIQMGCFFWAVCBQUIV0?xml=/news/2007/12/23/nxmas223.xmlA remote spot in this little known country has been declared the "geographical centre of the world's spread of children" by a team of Swedish scientists who have advised that if Santa started

Motherhood and Anarchy...http://www.blogger.com/profile/12535139562870268574noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4916194339667122031.post-3299479722079217012007-12-18T12:51:00.001Z2009-05-30T10:05:46.923+01:00

I'm sorry, I've not written for ages. My only excuse is that I've been busy: busy marketing Revolution Baby and busy preparing for Christmas with my two children, but I'll tell you about that another time.I was on the radio again yesterday - is this becoming tedious? This time I was on GWR Bristol, on Stuart Elmore's show. Stuart has a feature called 4Play when listeners choose four tunes under

Motherhood and Anarchy...http://www.blogger.com/profile/12535139562870268574noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4916194339667122031.post-43057850072177127672007-11-29T20:05:00.001Z2009-05-30T11:00:48.974+01:00

Something worrying is happening - I'm getting a strange crush on Sportacus. For those of you who don't have young children or an addiction to CBeebies, Sportacus is the lead in an obnoxious programme called Lazy Town. I used to hate this programme and try to avoid my children watching it but I've relented because despite nauseating characters the subliminal message works: my four-year-old does

Motherhood and Anarchy...http://www.blogger.com/profile/12535139562870268574noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4916194339667122031.post-59533722152523793752007-11-26T20:58:00.001Z2009-05-30T11:01:16.894+01:00

I just listened to myself on the radio - and was pleasantly surprised! I was expecting to cringe but instead felt proud that I actually sounded as eloquent and authoritative as other radio guests. If you are now intrigued you can go to http://www.bbc.co.uk/bristol/content/articles/2007/11/23/revolutionbaby_feature.shtml to listen again, read a feature article and look at some photos. I'll be on

Motherhood and Anarchy...http://www.blogger.com/profile/12535139562870268574noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4916194339667122031.post-45987164804534718282007-11-23T20:26:00.001Z2009-05-30T10:08:36.757+01:00

On Monday I recorded my first radio interview. It's going to be serialised every night next week (starting Monday 26th November) on the Drive show on Radio Bristol. You can listen on-line (http://www.bbc.co.uk/bristol/local_radio/) and I'm told I'll be on shortly after 6pm.I'm very nervous about how I'll come across. A spoken interview is scary. When you're writing you can re-read, delete and

Motherhood and Anarchy...http://www.blogger.com/profile/12535139562870268574noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4916194339667122031.post-42158601379378735172007-11-22T20:51:00.002Z2009-05-30T10:15:16.510+01:00

Today I'm Virtuous Mummy. I took my children to the park while a wholesome casserole was cooking in the oven rather than dragging them across the parish on endless errands then dashing home for fish fingers and peas.I'm not sure why I bothered. The four year old announced he didn't like cooked carrots and the two year old only ate jacket potato. But I ate it. And as I'm eighteen weeks pregnant

Motherhood and Anarchy...http://www.blogger.com/profile/12535139562870268574noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4916194339667122031.post-21449086084552061462007-11-20T19:58:00.001Z2009-05-30T10:09:26.937+01:00

The launch of Revolution Baby: Motherhood and Anarchy in Kyrgyzstan on Saturday was fantastic! As we were setting up, the room filling with two yurts and colourful craft stalls, I suddenly felt excited that it was all coming together. I had wanted to create a Kyrgyz festival where people could learn something of the country. And I succeeded. There was a real buzz in the room, people enjoying a

Motherhood and Anarchy...http://www.blogger.com/profile/12535139562870268574noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4916194339667122031.post-81618248849752939862007-11-17T14:57:00.002Z2009-05-30T10:09:57.630+01:00

My mind has gone numb. In four hours I am launching Revolution Baby and yet my mind is empty. I'm hoping that everything I need is packed in the car. I'm hoping that the words I was planning to say will come back to me when the time comes for my speech. I feel out of control, the day drifting by to the inevitability of hosting a party for two hundred people.Wish me luck.

Motherhood and Anarchy...http://www.blogger.com/profile/12535139562870268574noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4916194339667122031.post-14997443003742553152007-11-14T20:52:00.003Z2009-06-19T09:37:19.157+01:00

Two very good friends have just announced that they are moving abroad to work for a few years. Selfishly, I am devastated. They currently live an hour away and as they have two children the same age as Tom and Ben we see each other often and talk regularly. I feel reassured by their proximity. Whenever Matthew has to go away to work I call them and ask if the boys and I can come and stay. They

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