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8 Tiny Ways in which I'm Improving My Life

This is a really interesting post from my friend Alastair Humphreys – adventurer, author, motivational speaker. I met Al when he cycled through Bishkek and stayed with us in our Soviet flat. The story of his four year cycle around the world is fascinating, as are Al’s blog posts. Like me he thinks and reflects on things, but whereas my thoughts are bogged down with children, his are more wide-reaching.

There are some good ideas for finding satisfaction in life in this 8 Ways blog post and the subsequent comments. This being a Motherhood and Anarchy blog I should probably add that not all of them are possible for parents - I can’t go for a run every morning and spend the moments when the kettle is boiling dashing around attending to chores and child demands. But, much of what is suggested I do already (I’m nauseatingly anti-television, it sucks you in with, mostly, such trivia and wastes voids of time) and I agree entirely with the sentiments; to push yourself, try harder, start small and aim big. Al is taking a photo every day; it helps him to look for something positive and interesting. There is beauty around us in the normality of every day; children help you see that. Today it was the clouds, leaves and reflected autumn light. T pointed out a tiny green caterpillar. B loved the enormous bright moon rising in the darkening sky.

Reading this post and comments I feel overwhelmed by the possibilities of what is out there to do, read, browse on the Internet, listen to, reflect on, write about then start again. Oh how I wish I had endless time. As I don’t I think one of Al’s points is key – use what time you do have to maximum effect.

Ps, Al suggests having a cold shower – that one’s not for me!

Mommy Bloggers

This week, doing research for an interview, I found myself drawn into a network of “mommy bloggers”. I enjoyed reading their blogs. As one wrote “there is something powerful in the shared experience of motherhood, regardless of the situation or circumstances.” I find it very therapeutic to discover mothers who think about the same questions and express sentiments I am feeling, something I hope other mothers can gain from my writing. Therefore I would like to introduce some of the mommy bloggers here:

Gaijinmama – this is Suzanne Kamata, editor of Call Me Okaasan, the anthology I am featured in. She has a fascinating range of subjects on her site and writes about mothering bicultural twins in Japan.

Twinutero – Katherine Barrett is another writer who contributed to Call Me Okaasan. I am a fan as she eloquently expresses many sentiments I often feel. My favourite quote being “I love my kids; I love being a mother. But at times I feel oppressed by a job that tolerates no days off and no off days.”

Motherlogue – I was drawn in by her phrase “Motherlogue is a place to capture my words, thoughts and emotions along this journey”. I can relate to that.

black and A(broad) – I read a review of Call Me Okaasan on this blog and loved the quote “oftentimes mothers fall prey to self-sabotaging thoughts that promote isolation”.

While doing this research I've been thinking about how important it is to have a network. I am very lucky to live within a fantastic village community where I know many wonderful mothers who give me vital support through their friendship. The Internet, I've realised, has created the possibility for a parallel network of cyber-mums across the world. I'm now looking forward to reading about these global mothers and learning from their alternative perspectives.

Should I be blogging about my children?

Following on from my last post, I found this article interesting.

http://technology.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/tech_and_web/article5600675.ece

Blogging for Charity

Blogging is a strange thing. My husband encouraged me to start this blog to market Revolution Baby but as I write I still wonder who really cares what I think about Toys R Us or schools closing in snow. As far as I’m aware I only have two readers – Al Humphreys and my mother in law!

I was therefore excited to receive an email from Hotels Combined - someone else had read my blog! And they had a request - all I had to do was mention HotelsCombined.com in my blog and they would give $20 to one of their selected charities: WWF, World Vision or the Make-A-Wish Foundation. There, I’ve done it, the money is earned for charity and I can close now. But no, being interested in details I decided to tell you more.

Hotels Combined is a leading price comparison system used by over 25 million people every year. They aggregate and compare accommodation prices from all major sources such as Hotels.com, Travelocity.com, Priceline.com and many more. It is a free research tool helping users find the best priced accommodation option. If required, the reservation is made directly on the compared websites.

What I found more interested was their marketing technique, what a great way to promote your company by approaching bloggers to mention you for $20. Then I started thinking about the phenomenon of blogging. I wonder why I feel a compelling need to expose my thought processes to 1.5 billion Internet users. If you think about it, it’s extremely arrogant; you’re presupposing that you are important and or interesting enough for a stranger to spend their precious time reading about.

I was grateful to Bryan Appleyard in the Sunday Times for admitting it’s addictive. He lists many reasons for blogging; intimacy, exposure, the ease with which you can reach billions. For me the reason which resonated was “the relief involved in getting something instantly off my chest”.

This, I’ve realised, is why I blog; sharing my thoughts with anyone who might be passing is a form of free therapy. If no-one reads it, it doesn’t actually matter; the mere act of expressing myself serves the purpose.

My blog is often an outlet for frustration. I have thoughts I think are valid and want to express, so I dump them on the net and feel better that I’ve offloaded my rant. It’s actually a harmless way of anger management, you don’t abuse the kindness of friends by making them listen and you don’t make embarrassing mistakes. Take my entry about schools closing in snow. That started life as an email to my son’s headmistress. It’s probably best for all involved that it ended up on my blog.

Sometimes I’m testing book ideas. I’m writing a “mum’s diary”, Brigid Jones for those with children. Today’s working title is “There’s Always One Pooing: The Diary of a Mum-of-Three”. So, if you love or hate one of my entries, please write and tell me. Bryan Appleyard states that with the rise of the Internet “people were dazzled by their power to connect and communicate”. What I love is sharing ideas, the hope that someone out there might relate to what you write. That is what I hope mums will enjoy about The Diary.

According to BA it’s all about connectivity – you comment on someone’s blog and they come back to you. Hotels Combined are going to list my blog in their charity centre, http://www.hotelscombined.com/Charity.aspx. I advertise them, they advertise me, who knows who might read what and visit my blog or price up a hotel, more strands woven on the extraordinary Internet web.

At least this particular post has a purpose: I’ve mentioned Hotels Combined and they’ve given $20 to charity. But in doing so, I’m just realising, I’ve managed to focus the whole entry about me! That, I’ve decided, is the reason blogging is so popular - it’s the ultimate self indulgence because, even when you’re blogging for charity, it’s all about ME!